No parent intentionally tries to discourage their child from reading. But sometimes our actions do just that. Kids may be resilient, but they are also really sensitive, and how we handle reading in our homes can work for or against our kids’ reading attitude. Once a child writes reading off, it’s much harder to reel them back in and get them to give it a second shot. Here are eight things to avoid .
1. Don’t put down your child’s reading materials. Comics and books with crude humor often get dragged through the mud, as do character-driven books. Their choices may not be your favorite, but when you say no to a book, what your child may hear is no to reading. Instead of banning their beloved reading material , find a way to add in some more desirable books into the mix.
2. Don’t provide the wrong level material. No one likes reading something that makes them feel stupid. If the books are too hard they will frustrate your child. If the books are too easy, they will bore your little reader. You don’t need to know your child’s exact level; their interest will let you know. Go to the bookstore or library when you have a chunk of time and let them explore. Take out a bunch of books and try them out. Find favorite authors and read everything they’ve written, then start again with a new author.
3. Don’t use reading as a punishment. Saying things like “Go to your bedroom and read!” or “If you do that again, I will make you go read.” sets kids up to associate reading as a negative thing. Keep punishments and reading separate.
4. Don’t forget to give your child books as a gifts. Gifts are special, and starting at birth books make the best gifts – especially if you read them with the person who gave them to you. Book fairs at schools are a great place for kids to get excited about books, and we use them as treats!
5. Don’t explain to your child they aren’t really reading yet when they are only looking at the pictures. If we tell our children they aren’t readers, they will believe it, and to a child this isn’t as fluid as it is for adults. They don’t see that reading is developmental, and this blow to their confidence can really stick with them. If they aren’t decoding words yet, let them know that they can “read the pictures” and tell the story that way until they can read the words too.
6. Don’t forget to let your kids see you read for fun. Studies show that kids with parents who read often for pleasure are more likely to read for fun themselves. So if you want a kid who loves to read, let them see you reading too.
7. Don’t over-correct and over-practice. It’s exciting when your child starts to read independently, but forcing them to read and reread text until they have it perfect is not the most effective way to encourage or instruct. Read with your new reader and help when they ask for it. If they miss a word but the meaning is intact, don’t interrupt. If the meaning of the sentence is all screwy, wait for a natural pause and ask them, “Did that make sense?” You can revisit the word if it didn’t. Use the pictures and the rest of the text as clues if the word is too tough to decode. If you have to do this often, the text is too hard for your child. Choose something easier, or if they are insistent take turns reading so there is some fluency being modeled.
8. Don’t forget to read to your kids. Every day. Even those days when you just want them to go to sleep already!!
Check out Scholastic Parents Raise a Reader blog for more simple ways to bring literacy into your family. Together with Amy from Teachmama.com I share with readers tips, tricks and tried and true ways to Raise a Reader.
37 Responses to “8 Ways Parents Discourage Their Kids From Reading”
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Keeping books accessible to kids is also a great idea. So even for my 9 month old, I keep books in a stand in her room that she can reach and has books in it that are ok for her to pull out, and even chew on a bit. She absolutely loves getting into her books and is a great listener when I do read to her!
Such a great point – yes !!
Great list! There are many parents who don’t think graphic novels or picture books are “real books.” I tell them that as long as the kids have a book in their hands, it doesn’t much matter if the contents please the parents. Let your kids read what they want…they’re reading and that’s the important part!
Graphic novels are perfect for struggling readers because of all of the inferencing they allow kids to do. This is a great way to make a struggling reader feel better about how much they really do know and to improve their reading confidence. (I speak from experience as a former reading specialist, as an English teacher and as an avid reader).
Yes those are really good tips. thanks for sharing
Great post! I would say an alternate title could be How TEACHERS Discourage Reading.
That being said, I’ve had great luck with getting kids more interested in “real” books by doing class read alouds. They always fall in love with them and want to read other books from the featured authors.
I have controversial thoughts on “leveled” reading. As an upper(ish) elementary school level (3rd) my students have all access to all books regardless of their reading level. I’ve had kids several grade levels below choose “hard books” because they were interested in the topic and “read” the books using the pictures and context clues. They usually picked non fiction books to learn more about a topic they were interested and asked me or a neighbor for help. I didn’t turn them away because they couldn’t read it independently and they got something from the experience.
Looking forward to reading more posts!
PS – I sent my husband here to get ideas for play for our 2 year old. Your site is super helpful.
I have mixed feelings about leveled reading too but understand why they are used . I think ultimately it comes down to the fact that kids are individuals and if parents and teachers can really look at their specific needs we can let them shine. I am always amazed when teachers with classes of 15, 20 or 25 can do this !
Thank you, than you, thank you! I needed to hear this. My first, newly independent reader will be grateful I did.
These are great tips. My son is in the process of reading independently and it is an exciting time to see him grow and develop.
Hi! I saw the link on pinterest and as a mom of three under 8 really interested in literacy for my kids, I had to see if I was committing one of these sins! lol My kids, thankfully, all love books so much that we are reading the Chronicles of Narnia before bed each night together besides their regular reading. Being sometimes over-opinionated on this topic, though, I couldn’t help but want to share one thought… I don’t feel that rude or crude humor should be encouraged for small children, but as a parent, it is our job to monitor what ends up in front of them. If someone gave my child a book I thought was inappropriate for them, I wouldn’t feel the least bit sorry about throwing it away the second the kids were in bed that night. My solution is, we provide SO many positive reading options that the garbage isn’t missed. If your kids think Captain Underpants or other books with bathroom humor are funny, I guarantee you they will howl at “My Life As A Chicken,” which is actually hilarious and written in prose and some of the other amazing books out there. You don’t have to tell your kids something is bad, just replace it with something better.
Just giving another option for parents that want the ability to set standards in the home without feeling guilty that they are keeping their kids from becoming happy, healthy readers.
I don’t think parents should not set any rules or standards in their home but they need to be prepared for their kids not being into other books. A lot of parents have said ” never in my house” until their kids love reading because of one of these less than proper books. I don’t suggest only giving them these to read but to perhaps think twice before banning something just because you don’t like it.
I agree with you Allison. A lot of juvenile humor books (like Captain Underpants) allow budding readers to get their feet in the door. Children’s tastes and appreciation for literature do mature. Parents can set limits for their children as far as reading material goes, but I would encourage them to talk to their kids about books that they may find questionable and not adopt a strong attitude of censorship.
My tip would be letting kids choose the books they want to read or borrow from the library. Choice is a powerful motivator for literacy.
By the way, great blog! I am enjoying persuing all of your excellent ideas!
Terrific list! I especially like the one about letting your kids see you read. I remember those days when I saved reading for “after little one was in bed”… His perception of books changed, once he saw me more engaged with my reading.
I shared a list of 10 books moms should read – while encouraging their kids to read here: http://www.wisdomrootslibrary.com/2013/03/if-you-want-your-child-to-read.html
As a middle-school librarian, I find that there is a place for the mild, crude humor in getting some kids to read who otherwise might not pick up a book at all. As a mom, I don’t like those very same books for my own kids.
My suggestion as a parent and librarian–before you ban a book from your home, read it thoroughly (some books with one or two objectionable elements, might overall have a great message when read as a complete work). Then, discuss with your kid, *why* you feel the book is objectionable. This open discussion will allow your kids the freedom to express what they did and didn’t like about the book and will help you guide them to similar reading that will be a better fit for your family.
Great advice!
Before your kids can actually decode the words, encourage them to look at the pictures and make up their own story. This builds self confidence and puts them one step closer to reading.
I read to both of my children from the time they were born and still read to my oldest(7) every single night. I read one to her and then she reads on to me. She is reading at a 3rd grade level in 1st grade. My son is 2 and LOVES books. We probably read 30 books a day. It is his favorite thing to do. Hoping he will catch on just as well as his sister! These are great tips and I was glad that I hadn’t done any of these!
LOVE this article! Thanks so much for your grea ideas!
Great list Allison! I agree with all! The only one I feel guilty about (a bit) is #1 in the sense that there are just a few books in our collection that I find painful to read.. just so nonsensical or loooong and drawn out. I have to admit wanting to hide or get rid of those books but I haven’t brought myself to doing so because my five year old likes them! Just one of the many sacrifices we make for our children!
Absolutely! Particularly number 1. I am so grateful to my parents for subscribing me to a weekly comic when I was 5 (TV Comic, fact fans) and encouraging me with Doctor Who and Secret Seven books when I was 6+. Asterix was also a key influence on my reading at an early age. Never “You should read this. It’s a classic” before handing me Oliver Twist or something.
I eventually found my way to all the other books myself BECAUSE I loved reading, and not because they were supposed to MAKE ME love reading.
Something I hear over and over especially from men. Thanks for the comment!
This is excellent advice.
Grown-ups can be so hurtful sometimes
Thanks so much for these very important pointers!
Read Aloud Dad
Interesting piece but – please – “read every day” – NOT EVER “read everyday”. (Wince.)
Everyday for every day, loose for lose, hone in for home in and thankyou for thank you are errors I see over and over and over in my editing work.
Thanks – I added #8 in after my trusty proof reader had gone to bed. Thanks for the comment so I could fix it!
Absolutely Point #8! Parents who read to their children can share vicariously in so many wonderful experiences with their child. It provides access to much more complex literature than an early reader can manage, opens topics for discussion, allows you to explore new worlds together, laugh together, cry together and generally engage together in a way which can be hard to achieve in our modern technology-driven world. I read to each of my 3 children each night (usually separately as their ages were spaced out a bit) until they were about 14yrs and expressed their idea that Mum should ‘get over it’! However to this day we can mention shared moments in reading series (eg Swallows and Amazons etc) and know what the other means immediately. (PS My kids are all adults now, the oldest 30 with 2 little ones, so I get to read bedtime stories again to his children! Wonderful!)
Great list of how parents can help their early readers! As a kindergarten teacher, I see so many parental behaviors that are helpful (like the ones on your list) and some not so helpful. I would like to add item #9, Do not cover up the pictures. Some parents think that forces their child to learn to read by sounding out the letters of the words. So much of what we do as good readers is to glance at the picture or the word for cues and seeing if that fits the context and lends to the meaning of the text. That’s why young readers are able to read “Beautiful butterfly” before they can spell it. “Sliding” through some words help build their fluency as well.
I have never heard of parents covering pictures! I can see that happening and why they may think it’s useful. I will add that to another article soon. Thank you!
[...] 8 Ways Parents Discourage Their Kids From Reading [...]
Excellent post! May I have your permission to reproduce this and hand it out at my story times?
Yes you may print it as is ( making sure the blog header and my name are included) and hand out. Thanks!
[...] 8 Ways Parents Discourage Their Kids From Reading [...]
I’d also recommend that parents (and teachers) continue to read quality picture books to older children, and allow them to choose those books to read to themselves (or to siblings or student-partners). Because they are meant to be read by adults, to kids, they usually have more advanced vocabulary and more challenging words for a child to read. Some early chapter books have such simplified language, they don’t offer much in the way of advancing a child’s reading skills. There is almost always a well-written story line, and a moral to the story, in picture books. And they can be personalized to a child’s personality … silly, serious, warm, cerebral, etc. Long live the picture book!
I agree with everything you said except the first sentence.
“No parent intentionally tries to discourage their child from reading.” We did all the other things with our children and they are now (at 8 & 10) such book worms that I often have to tell them they are not allowed to read until … (eg until they are ready for school, or have had their shower, or done a chore, etc). It is, however, a good problem to have.
My only other difficulty with having a family of readers is the hefty fine that adds up if we don’t make it to the library to return the piles of books we’ve borrowed (& I’ve forgotten to go online and renew them).
Being a confident and eager reader makes so much else in life so much easier – and wouldn’t we all want to give our kids whatever advantage we can?
I read an interesting statistic the other day that said that the best indicator of a child’s performance at school was whether their parents read to them and this even outweighed other factors like socioeconomic disadvantage. Amazing!
[...] Check out the article here. [...]
Thank you for this list! I just pinned it as a reminder to myself
Number 5 makes me laugh. I ask my daughter (3) if she’s reading when she looks at books and she says, “No you silly! Me can’t read!” , usually proceeded by asking me to read the book to her.